So much for that group hike

I took the kids for a hike today. Which is to say, I drove the kids to a hiking spot, hopped out of the car, and had one of the two kids follow me.

The second one refused to leave the car. "I don't want to go on a hike," he said, while crossing his arms and entering his sulk mode. I stood there for a bit, holding the door open, debating my options. I'm bigger than he is by more than a factor of two. I could wrestle him out of his car seat, throw him under my arm and stomp down the trail. The other kid was watching me, waiting to see what I would do.

I closed his door, opened the driver's door, rolled down all the windows, closed the door, locked the car and walked away.

Kids are a simpler version of adults, but have the same basic requirement of control: they have to give you permission.

Kids have to give you permission to parent them. Adults have to give you permission to govern them. Without either set of permissions, those in the power role cannot maintain power.

It's a different facet of Eleanor Roosevelt's quote, "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." If you don't give someone else permission to govern you, if you rise up against an injust system, things can change.

In this particular case, the kid had to power to make my hike time miserable. That is where his power lies. I chose not to allow him to ruin my morning hike, so walked away with the bigger kid. We went off and had our hike, while the smaller kid sat in the car pouting. We saw a number of adorable dogs, only one beagle, before I realized we were hiking in an off-leash dog park. Both of us had a wonderful time.

Fortunately, we missed all of the dog poop on the ground. Back to the car we went, the small one still pouting.

I have to say, I was happy to pet a bunch of friendly dogs and hand the kids back to their mother. Small people in small doses should be my new mantra.