Cooking pumpkins

What the hell is it with my body and ultimate? I swear, my breasts grow the size of cooking pumpkins just before every important ultimate tournament. They've done this for the last four years and it's getting very annoying. There's only so many times you can allow your left breast to have an amazing block of your own throw before it becomes quite annoying.

At this point, though I would have to argue that the super-sonic breast enlargement trick is not just for ultimate tournaments any more. They grew huge for my UCPC talk, too. I'm walking around with two ten pound weights on my chest thinking, "Does this make me look fat?"

Stupid breasts.

Hi, Mom!