So, Why is Kitt Paranoid?

So, one of the great things about being around people is that you meet some incredibly interesting ones. A couple weeks ago, I was told the person two people away from me was a security guy and likely the only person my friend personally knew who was more paranoid and security conscious than I am. There are many many many people who are more paranoid about security than I am, but not that this friend knew. Said person two people over had also done a number of security things that I particularly liked, so I introduced myself to him.

"Hi, I'm Kitt. I'm told I love you."

While this is a perfectly normal introduction for me to make, apparently it takes some people aback.

Who knew?

We talked for a bit about this, that, the other thing, and, of course, briefly about security. I explained why "I loved him," how I appreciated his work in security. My friend also explained that I was the second most security-wise paranoid person he knew.

After a bit, the security turned to me and asked, "So, why is Kitt paranoid?"

And I stopped up short.

Why am I so security paranoid?

What is it like to grow up not being the physically weakest person on a team? What is it like to grow up not being picked last for all teams? What is it like to grow up not having to look over your shoulder for the next bad thing about to happen?

Yeah.

Our experiences as small children shape who we become, our ways of thinking, and, in some cases, our needs as adults.

That all said, when my first linux box was hacked into by a script kiddie from Florida (which is to say, yes, I was able to track the kid down, and yes, he was a kid, and yes, the FBI were called in, and yes, the kid was in some way punished, though I don't know the details), my eyes were opened to just how fragile the Internet is. I understood that I needed to be more careful about the software I put out, because all software of sufficient complexity has bug, and the Internet is sufficiently complex.

I am thankful I learned the lesson when the stakes were low and I didn't really have much to lose. I am also thankful that I had friends who knew enough to help me learn what I needed to learn.

I'm way sure I'm nowhere near as paranoid about security as I should be, as I need to be. I like being able to share with the world what I share, and not share what I don't want to share. My reasons for sharing are mine, said sharing shouldn't be forced (ala Egger's world in The Circle). Security is part of the process of keeping private what I want to be private.

My answer to my friend's friend wasn't as wordy, however. It didn't go into my childhood traumas, it didn't go through my fears or my experiences.

Instead, I answered him simply, "I've seen how the sausage is made."