Best poop of anyone

I've decided I really like my poop. Not only do I poop fast, but it also comes out in very discrete groups, piles even, so that when I wipe, little comes off onto the paper as there's little there. Unlike some people, I think, I'm not smearing crap all over my butt.

And! It comes after announcing itself.

Yes, I have the best poop ever.

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