Thanks, lady!

Great, just great. Some woman thinks it's okay to let her dog just poop in our yard and walk away. Oh, it's a small dog, its poop is small, she'll say. WTF, mate? It's still dog poop. It's still hazardous to children who might, oh, I don't know, play near it, or pick lemons off my tree near your dog's shit. It's gross, woman.

My dad doesn't pick up his dog's poop, either. "It's small," is his excuse.

Next time, I'm running out, even if I'm nearly naked, and handing the woman a doggie bag. If she doesn't take it and use it, I hereby declare she has given me permission to kick her dog.

It's small. It'll punt quite nicely.