"I miss the Bella."

"I do, too."

"When will I stop missing her?"

"Never."

Yesterday, I came across an SD card that I hadn't cleaned out yet, and looked at the pictures on it. They're from the month before Bella died. We were taking her to the vet for fluids regularly, and the pictures were of her in my car on the way to the vet. Everyone at the vet's knew her, they knew me. She never had to wait for her appointment: she'd show up and be ushered into the back room with no delay. I'm pretty sure that didn't thrill her.

I can honestly say, as a cat person, I never expected to miss a dog. Bella had very cat-like qualities, and reminded me in many, many ways of Dirty Mitten, Jenny's cat when we were growing up. That cat would always console anyone crying, and be around people when all the time. She was a good cat.

Bella was a good dog.

Odd to say, but Bella is the first pet I've had die. All my other pets either ran away or were given away earlier. Bella was the first who died still with me.

I miss her howling. I miss her stinkiness. I miss her snuggling. I miss her single lick of the nose to say hello. I miss her curling up into a ball at my feet. I miss her warm puppy breath. I miss her tricking Annie into leaving the spot Annie was sitting in, because Bella wanted to sit there. I miss her burrowing. I miss a lot about that dog. I still miss her every day.

An aunt of mine told me that you never stop missing your pets after they pass. You have other pets that you hope will fill the holes created when the earlier ones die; but, the new ones don't really fill those holes. Instead, you love each of your pets, and gather more holes as they pass, and celebrate their lives and the time you had with them.

I wonder how many more of these Bella picture surprises I'll have.

I hope I remember to celebrate them and not be sad because of the pictures.

Good girl, Bella.

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One of the things that I do on a regular basis is say some form of "hello!" to people who follow me on twitter. I think of twitter as a giant party where you're talking with a group of people, but everyone around you can overhear what you're saying. When I notice someone listening in, I prefer to turn to her/him, put my hand out in greeting, and say hello. On twitter, that means when my account is followed by someone, I like to tweet a greeting.

Here is rather one way in the other direction. I write stuff about things that interest me, things that happened in my life, but here is less conversational, and a lot more of a bunch of stuff written down so that I can remember what's been going on in my life, than anything else. And maybe a place to throw up words sometimes.

There is, however, that Contact link over there.

And I have to say, that sometimes wonderful things happen from that link.

Today, I received this email:

So my dog paws the laptop...

and ki.tt is where my browser took me. Now I'm browsing through your life
like some sort of creeper. I guess it wouldn't be here if you cared about
randoms. You're interesting, not afraid of saying 'fuck', and have a skill
set and world of experiences entirely different from my own. Oh, and I'm of
the male liking women smarter than he is persuasion. Not the silly middle
school like, more the appreciation like. At any rate, I've bookmarked your
site, and will pop in once in a while for no reason but to appreciate. Have a great day!

Seriously now, after that email, I will totally have a great day. It totally brightened everything up!

You know what else brightens me up? The happy face of a dog just so excited to see you! (Even better? Smart dogs that take you to ki.tt.)

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Comment spam from earlier today:

naturally like your web site however you have to take a look at the spelling on several of your posts.
Several of them are rife with spelling problems and
I find it very troublesome to tell the reality on the other hand I'll certainly come again again.

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You have to fucking care about you.

A lesson I have finally learned.

A company won't do it, you have to do it.

Related: Hey! I'm writing a book about Drush!

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I have so few items on my bucket list that it seems almost odd to even be thinking about writing down a bucket list. I do have a few items, though:

1. Walk on every continent.
2. Swim on both sides of every ocean.

I've been doing an okay job with that first one, having walked on North America, South America, Australia, Africa, Europe and Asia. I tried Antarctica over a year ago, but, well, that didn't work out. Maybe this coming winter, er, Antarctic summer.

I've been doing an okay job with that second one, having swum on one side of the Pacific Ocean, both sides of the Indian Ocean, and one side of the Atlantic Ocean. There aren't really sides to the Arctic and Southern Oceans. I expected to swim in the Southern Ocean during that trip to Antarctica, with a Solar Plunge, which includes a defibrillator and a glass of whiskey at the end.

I used to chase eclipses, which is a fantastic way to choose new, interesting destinations when travelling. That chasing took me to Machu Picchu and Curacao, both places I likely wouldn't have visited otherwise (of note, the mosquito-less Aruba and Curacao are mosquito-less for a reason, and that reason also causes them to be nominally vegetation-free, and that reason isn't pleasant for a mountain girl).

Ultimate changed my destination selection algorithm, with travelling to new places depending on where the next tournament was. Another good way to choose a bucket list, BTW: play ultimate on every continent.

I've decide that the next item to add to my travel destination generator masquerading as a not-really-but-sorta-is bucket list is hexagonal basalt formations. I've been meaning to go to Devil's Postpile since Mom and I went to the Giant's Causeway years ago. And now, having found a list of basalt formations, from kottke.org, I have to say that, yes, this would be a great way to travel around the world.

The places listed are:

1. Litlanesfoss, Iceland
2. Sea Cave on the Akun Island, Alaska, USA
3. Ghenh Da Dia, Vietnam
4. Takachiho Gorge, Japan
5. Los Organos, Canary Islands, Spain
6. Jusangjeolli Cliffs, South Korea
7. Garni Gorge, Armenia
8. Fingal's Cave, UK
9. Giant's Causeway, UK
10. Prismas Basálticos, Mexico
11. Kirkjugólf, Iceland
12. Svartifoss, Iceland
13. Hexagon Pool, Israel
14. Cape Stolbchaty, Russia

I'm adding:

15. Devil's Postpile

One of those I've done. One trip going from Iceland to the UK and I have another 1/3 of them. A weekend trip to Devil's Postpile and I'm approaching half of them seen.

Should be a fun item to cross off the bucket list.

Right after that Solar, er, Polar Plunge.

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